AFTER THE CYCLONE HIT MYANMAR……

Grief beyond Tears

A trip to Daoh Gyi (May 16-19, 2008)

 

This life account is dedicated to thousands of survivors of Cyclone Nargis that hit Myanmar on May 2-3, 2008 who being alive still face the grief from their loss. We met a man who has boat on the day we intended to travel from Bogale to Daoh Gyi. He was willing to take us on his boat while we had been unsuccessful to find anyone to take us across the river to Daoh Gyi. Prior to the Cyclone, about 100-150 boats travel this route daily. At this time, no one was willing to travel on that path on the Ayerwaddy. There seemed to be silent fears in the air for people to use the river. Besides, there were rumors that another Cyclone is coming. 

There seemed to be fear on the face of our guide from the village. No one said a word about their fear. We finally found a man with a boat that was willing to take us to Daoh Gyi. When we met him, he asked us to pay him diesel fee and we gladly obliged. As most of our team members had grew up in the city, none of us understood why there was such a fear about going on a boat in a river. 

 

Facing fear on the River of Death

About 20 minutes into our boat journey from the river bank at Bogale, it started to rain heavily. Strong winds and waves came at our boat. Our boat started to swing left and right strongly. The boatman focused attentively to navigate our boat then he started starring at a certain direction as if he spotted something. I got up from my seat and looked towards the direction where he looked. I saw corpses floating everywhere on the river. My hair stood up. Now I tasted what everyone was fearful about.

 

My friends saw me taking out my camera as if I have spotted something important. When they saw what I saw, they started screaming hysterically. Our boat was still beaten by strong wind, rain and waves while we navigated through the zone of floating corpses. The screaming continued. I don’t know what exactly I was feeling anymore, it was like fear, worry and anxiety all mixed up into one reality. I can feel my body heating up. Then we began to pray to the Lord like never before for at least 20 minutes. 

 

After a while, the rain stopped and the river calmed down. I began to talk to the boatman about his experience. He had a stoic look. He only gave me brief answer to my question. He never smiled even though I tried to lighten our conversation with a joke or light hearted subject. Then I remembered all along our journey since the Cyclone, we had never really seen any villagers that smiled even though I tried to be courteous to everyone we met. It has been too long since I saw a genuine heart-felt smile.

 

“My baby or My wife”:

A Cyclone that took away my most precious loved ones.

Then, I began to hear his heart-breaking story of “my baby or my wife….” This was only one story of the millions of people who had been affected by this most violent storm in the modern history of Myanmar. A wind of change that changed everything about us, the people of Myanmar. While we were traveling on the boat, this man began to tell us his story. He had been recently married and had a 5-month old baby. On the day the Cyclone hit, he said that a very high flood (12ft wave) and wind hit them. He climbed a tree with his family. He held on to his baby and wife with one hand and held on the tree with the other hand. The wind and flood was too strong. His wife couldn’t hold on any longer and he had only one hand to hold both the baby and his wife. His wife was swept away by the violent wind and flood. It was either his wife or his baby. He said that he believed she was swept near one of the river banks and she was wearing red clothes on the day she was swept away. He could not save his wife. If he stretched out his hand, his baby would have suffered the same fate. He can only look at his wife been swept away by this violent wind and flood. He has been looking for his wife since the Cyclone was over. 

 

When he knew we needed a boat on this river, he accepted our job as he hoped to see his wife on this trip. The 5-month old baby survived and he has been feeding him with milk. The baby is well. Since, he lost his wife, he had cried until there was no more tears left to shed. I can see that he was grieved beyond tears. Perhaps, when his child grows up, he will let him know that he had saved him at the cost of his mother’s life. He has no food, no place to live, and he is hoping to see his wife every day. 

 

 “Looking for my wife among the dead”

After hearing his heart-breaking story about his baby and his wife, I decided to help him out by requesting him to navigate the boat near the river bank with the hope that we can find a woman in red dress or a female corpse covered in red garments. For miles, we looked at as many bodies that we could see that had been washed up the river bank but we did not find anyone that resembled his wife. He did that again on our way back from Daoh Gyi to Bogale and still, we did not see any corpse covered in red garments.  This was indeed a day when we accompanied a man who was looking for his wife among the dead. 

 

I thought to myself I will never tell this sad story again but every night since I met him, I thought of him and I cried. The images of these precious people flashed through my mind everyday. Every time, I take a meal, I  see these hungry orphans looking at me, beckoning me to come and help. 

 

I wrote a poem dedicated to these precious children who survived the Cyclone and flood on May 3, but who still live in great risk every moment. 

 

“O dear little innocent children, know that I love you,

I pray and fast from food knowing you are hungry,

I kneel down and pray knowing you are sad,

I shed my tears knowing you are lonely and afraid,

I want you to know you are not alone, know that I love you.”

 

Written on May 22, 2008, by

Andrew (brother of SIster Levi Lim)

Posted on www.ilovemyanmar.org